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Why Are We Yelling?

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But if we make a habit of pushing the frustration too far down, sometimes we begin to believe we’re at fault for being frustrated, and we beat ourselves up about it. If we do that, the arguments decrease in frequency, but we’re left with a constant low-level anxiety that slowly wears away at our mental and physical health. — location: 96 ^ref-39327

Hiding from our negative emotions doesn’t make them go away. They’ll find some way out, even if it kills us. — location: 101 ^ref-47768

the art of productive disagreement is the most important metaskill anyone can acquire. — location: 123 ^ref-4242

happen? The common thread among all of these behaviors that show up as a result of the backfire effect is our perception of an unacceptable demand on our freedom. — location: 202 ^ref-39739

bribe. This is how persuasion works . . . which is very different from the art of productive disagreement. Persuasion is all about piling incentives, rewards, and sometimes threats onto a decision in order to tip the scales in your favor. — location: 222 ^ref-25325